There is no Crying in Baseball
by AcheronianAngel
Summary: After years of fruitless attempts to rid of Sportacus, Robbie threatens to leave town. No one ever thought he was serious, but after they find his lair empty and nothing but a note in his place, the mystery becomes much deeper than anyone could have ever imagined. No one could have imagined just who his disappearance would effect the most.


It was a bootiful morning in lazytown, and the fabulous Robbie Rotten was preening his newest outfit, which was a glorious bedazzled pink tuxedo. The totes fab suit sparkled in the light, blinding those stupid enough to stare for more than six seconds, although, it was difficult not to with that totes swagalicious bod of his.

"ZOMG," Robbie started, stars growing in his eyes. "So prettyful it be." As he was admiring his womanly fabulosity, Sportacus suddenly flew into his lair like a wrecking ball, all swaglike.

"HAShTaG YOLOSWAG ON THE CLUB!1" He yelled as he began twerking on Robbie's orange chair. Robbie watched, horrified, as his favorite sitting tool was being desecrated by Sportacus's sweet ass cheeks. FEEL THE FLEASH. TASTE THE FLEASH.

"U know you be wanting dis, Robbie-Kun." The flipping moron spoke, slapping his perfect butt. He stared up at Robbie with large desu eyes, and kawaii colors growing on his cheeks. It was barely like, 6 phantasmagorical moments of looking at the fabulous man before doing some super unnecessary flips, while shielding his slightly flammable eyes, to Robbie's feet. "Senpai, your suit! So awesome it be!"

"Sporta-chan, what is you doing in my mutha fucking lair?" The sparkly man asked.

"I have some not-so-swaggy news for you. I be preggo." The elf spoke, growing slightly more serious. "You be the father." Robbie's eyes widened as he gasped slightly louder than one should in a situation like this.

"I'm not ready to be a baby daddy!" He flailed, as a single manly tire rolled down his cheek.

"I forgot the anti-beibes pills!" Sportasportasporty(potty)pooh wailed with his maybe luver?

Robbie glared down at the emotionally wrecked mother father elf thing ruining his poifectly good shoes that are pink and now covered in the salty tears of what used to be called Sportacus. He is now known globally as Sportamommy bcuz I said so.

"I'm off ta da clubfgvf" Robbie said, kickign Sportamom off his feets. He then walked away, his hips swinging and stuff. so yeah.

"Daddy, no!" Sportamom shouted, raeching his hands out fo Robbie's tightly-clothed buttocks.

"TA DA CLUBFGVF!" He yelld, exitin his supa fab lair.

Afta leaving, he totes went to da club, Fgvf, just as he said.

Robbie son arrivved at Fgvf, and opneed the large red doOr that lead to da clube. Right when he entered, he found Stingy and Zigy at da bar. Both were totes wastd.

"Yo, Zig." Stingy started, gettin the otheres attention. "I luv you, man."

"ZOMG. I luv you, too."

"You know, you have totes been mine all along. I own you." Stingy said, leaning in to kiss the candy-luvr. But, before there lips met, Ziggy transformed into a staplr. Stingy gasped, but qickly grabed him. "No mater what form, you be da best damn ting thats ever been mine." He caresed the stapler.

"Okay, then." Robbie stated, passing by the intoicated 5 yr old and stapler.

"EY!" Pixel the black gUnger DJ shouted at da supa prettyful man. "YO FO SHIZZLE MAH NIZZLE ROBIBBLE DAWG." The Rob of Rotten looked over at the black puppet thing, and shouted with the force of a trillion rainbows,

"PUT MY MOTHAFUCKIN JIMMIE JAM ON." And he sauntered to the very rainbowy and gay dance floor, where only Bessie and the Mayor was, which is pretty much the whole population of lazytown. Drop-kickign them out of his way was easy, and he swished his pretty hips to his sweet jimmie jam. Just then, Sportamommy and Stephanie rode in, crashing through the wall riding the back of Thor.

"Wtf lol" Robbie tweeted. Outside the clubfgv, Trixie was trying to get in, but da guards wouldn't let her cuz no one likes her and she's not that important. All swaglike, Sportamommy threw on a SnapBack and put a flower in his mouth, dancing wit his baby daddy. Stephanie rode her Thor up to the black ginger dj who's hair looked odly like French fries. He held out his arms, he knew this day would come. He jumped the back of the Thor and they rode into the sunset where the sun also exploded because your not supposed to ride directly into the sun.

"Stephanie bbg gurl of my lief" pixel the black ginger fry head whispered into Stephanie's wig as they explode.

"Sup mothafukahs" stingy straughtened his bow tie and stepped gloriously o to the dance floor, although Idk how he actually got there, he jus magic I guess. He held his little staplet candy love love in his hand, he made out with it, but it was kinda gross so no one looksed.


End file.
